I Know The Future, And It Could Taste Really, Really Good. Or Really, Really Bad. Hard To Say.

15 May

After careful thought and consideration, I can say with assurance of gut instinct that I know what the next big item in bakeries will be. You may have noticed that as of late cupcakes are all the rage with sweet-toothed people around the country, but cupcakes, while delicious, are on the downslide of their popularity tour. That’s not to say that cupcakes won’t still be a hit, and we won’t continue to see the plethora of cupcakeries that have popped up in the last 18 months* doing strong business. Because let’s face it: cupcakes are awesome. When made correctly, they’re delicious. They’re mini-cakes! You can eat them with one hand! They’re just so fucking cute!

But their luster and fame will fade into normal, baked-good love, you mark my words, and after everyone has calmed down with the cupcake crazies, a new era will start, and that will be the era of: Oversized Cookies Packed With Inclusions.

I came to this realization the other night as I baked up a batch of peanut butter-oatmeal-banana-chocolate chip cookies. As I pulled the cookies out of the oven, admiring their golden brownness, the way that they had flattened and oozed out to bigger circles during the baking process, and later, as I sampled a piece of cooled cookie, chewy and delicious, I realized with certainty this will be the Next Big Thing In Baked Goods.

Example: oversized oatmeal cookie (chewy, of course) with inclusions of Craisins, white chocolate chips, and almonds. Or an oversize peanut butter cookie with M&Ms and banana chip pieces. Trust me. This is what’s coming next. And as oversized cookies with multiple inclusions grow in popularity, all the bakers in all the land will try and out-do each other for most inclusions in a cookie, or wackiest inclusions, which is how we will end up with jalapeno and chocolate chip sugar cookie, which the bakery bakers will claim people LURV.

Actually, that could be kind of good. I may have to experiment. I MAY HAVE TO START THIS TREND MYSELF AND WHIP EVERYONE INTO A FERVOR!




Just you wait.

You’ll see.

I’m totally right on this.

*At least, we’ve seen a plethora pop up in DC. I’m not sure about the rest of the nation, but be assured that Our Nation’s Capital is awash with cupcakeries these days.


4 Responses to “I Know The Future, And It Could Taste Really, Really Good. Or Really, Really Bad. Hard To Say.”

  1. niobe May 15, 2009 at 7:54 AM #

    From your keyboard to the zeitgeist’s ears.

  2. Jennifer May 15, 2009 at 9:06 AM #

    How can you whip up interest in the next big thing without a colorful, luscious, scratch-n-sniff photograph of those peanut butter-banana-bottle rocket-oatmeal-kumquat-salmon-chocolate chip cookies you just made?

  3. Molly May 15, 2009 at 9:08 AM #

    Because my fish ate my camera?

    Monday. I will have a photo added by Monday. Pinky swear.

  4. Cassie May 15, 2009 at 2:43 PM #

    What you really need to get the trend going is a good acronym.
    OCMI doesn’t really cut it.
    BIC? (big, interstesting cookies)
    CWI (Cookies with inclusions)
    COSS (cookies, oversised, stuffed with stuff)

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