on running out of gas and the meaning of life. and dinner.

5 Aug

The other day I was driving home from the allergist and I ran out of gas. I mean there I was, driving along, and I turned onto Racine, and then bloodebloodebloodebloooo….the car just sort of petered out in the middle of it all. Thankfully when I felt the first blooooo coming on, my mad driving skillz instincts kicked in and I angled toward the curb, and eventually sort of just coasted to the side until I full stopped and turned the car off. I called Swede to tell him, “Hey, I think I ran out of gas,” and he immediately offered to come to me, and when I asked, “How are you going to get here? I have the only car in our household,” he gallantly responded, “I could run.”

I love him for that response, but it was hot out, and no one needs to run in any kind of heat, that’s just silly, and besides, this is the whole reason why we have AAA. Well, that and because our car is 11 years old and has 190,000 miles on it, and let me tell you something you don’t know: AAA has saved my fanny on more than one occasion. This time included.

Thank God for AAA, amirite?

Anyway, I had about an hour to kill while waiting for AAA to come and give me enough gas to get me to the nearest station (funnily enough, right before this happened I’d pulled into a gas station, only to be turned away because the credit card machines weren’t working, and I haven’t carried more than $10 in cash on me since 2002), which is a really long time to think about Very Serious Topics, such as What It All Means, Why We Are Here, and What To Have For Dinner.

So, without further ado, I’d like to share with you the answers to these questions, because maybe you’re reading this while you’re stuck on the side of the road, having run out of gas too, and waiting for AAA.

What It All Means
Fuck if I know.

But I’m pretty sure if we substitute “Life” for “It” it means that you should do what you feel your purpose is called to be here on this planet. Listen, none of us are getting out of this thing alive, so as long as you’re not harming yourself, and you’re not harming anyone else (and if you’re harming yourself, YES, YOU ARE HARMING OTHER PEOPLE), do what makes you happy. Don’t be a fool, don’t suffer fools, and if nothing else, for the love of all that is holy and decent, take off your judgment pants once in awhile and try and see it from someone else’s perspective.

Why We Are Here

To eat pizza and read books. Amen.

What to Have For Dinner

Since our foreign exchange student has come to stay, my vegetarian cooking has really kicked up a notch. (Emily is a vegetarian, so I’m mostly cooking vegetarian—there are some glaring exceptions, of course I’M LOOKING AT YOU ROASTED CHICKEN LAST SUNDAY NIGHT—and honestly, I think I’m benefitting from it more than anyone else. A) it’s good in general to eat less meat (IMHO), and 2) Anything that helps me stretch as a cook is a good thing in my book.) So currently I’m going to recommend that you try these Southwestern egg rolls (wherein I swapped out the chicken for kidney beans) or this quinoa enchilada bake, or this quinoa spinach pesto, which is a knock off of a dish from Protein Bar, and really it’s a toss up as to which is better, the at-home dish or the one in the restaurant.

And if all else fails, order a pizza and call it a day.

I hope, dear Interwebers, you do not run out of gas anytime soon. But if you do, maybe you’ll ponder the big questions in your own life. And if that happens, let me know what your thoughts or answers are. I’m positive they’re probably different from mine because we are all individuals, and free will and etc and etc but let’s be honest: the real reason I want to know is because I’m nosy as all get-out, and I like to see how you do you.

Travel safely, my friends.

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