oh give thanks

24 Nov

Tomorrow morning I, along with The Swede and one of my brothers-in-law, will be lining up with a bunch of other jive turkeys to run an 8K in Lincoln Park.

If I survive, my Thanksgiving blessing will be thanking the sweet Lord above for that fact alone.

If I do not survive, you’re welcome to my helping of the pork sausage stuffing.

Unless I decide to come back to haunt you and snatch that helping of stuffing away into the ether that is The Other Side.

I have no one to blame but myself for these Thanksgiving morning shenanigans, because it was my idea (being that I was like, “Oh, right. I said I’d run a 5, 8, and 10K this year. Huh, the year’s almost over. Better get on that shit.”) and I fully expect that at some point The Swede and my brother-in-law will both point fingers at me and say, “This was a stupid idea, do you know we’re missing the Macy’s Day Parade?” But then The Swede will remember that he hates those Macy’s bastards as much as I do, so he’ll eventually forgive me. I’m not so sure about my brother-in-law.

Happy Thanksgiving to all my Interwebers. If you’re traveling, travel safe. If you’re visiting family, remember to play nice. And if you’re eating, eat slowly, and wear expandable pants.

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One Response to “oh give thanks”

  1. The Swede December 1, 2010 at 6:36 PM #

    It is true. I do hate Macy’s. With a fiery passion. Bring back Marshall Field’s you pompous Yankee dogs, no one wants to shop in your bland conformist stores anyway.

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